Challenging the distorted beliefs of dieting: Moving towards bodily intelligence

Dieting has never worked for me.

This type of thinking is akin to fortune-telling. At first glance, this pessimism seems plausible. You may have seen frequently cited statistics, such as 95% of dieters fail to lose weight, or if they do, their weight returns to its original level within a few years. But this statistic comes from a study published in a medical journal almost half a century ago.

Since then, we have learned a great deal about nutrition and exercise, developing cognitive and behavioral approaches. A Consumer Reports study of 19,000 people participating in commercial weight loss programs, such as Weight Watchers, found that more than 25% of participants lost weight and maintained it for at least two years. Another study found that half of Weight Watchers participants reached their desired weight and remained underweight five years later.

A recent random telephone survey found that 20% of those who were overweight at the time of the previous survey lost an average of 42 pounds this time and maintained that weight for 7 years. Clearly, losing weight is not easy, but many people who previously failed to lose weight have succeeded. Therefore, it's unreasonable to think that you won't succeed at losing weight.

I need to be strict with myself to lose weight.

This type of thinking often involves an irrational "should" statement. If you get angry at yourself every time you skip a diet or eat forbidden foods, you're telling yourself you should never skip it. This idealistic approach is unrealistic. Many habitual dieters also feel they need to hate their ugly obesity and despise themselves in some other way to stay motivated. This kind of thinking is unfortunate because self-loathing is unhealthy and useless for anyone.

The "should" mentality and disdain are frustrating; they diminish your motivation, which is essential for weight loss and change. People with bodily intelligence learn from their avoidance experiences, develop strategies to avoid situations that lead to avoidance, and encourage themselves each time they achieve a positive change.

It's unfair to make me diet.

This is yet another "should" statement. It would be wonderful if no one were born with a genetic predisposition to weight gain! But people are different. And how wonderful it would be if everyone were healthy, intelligent, and beautiful (or handsome)! But that doesn't align with the natural order of things. If you consider all the possible genetic diseases, disabilities, and predispositions to illness, then being prone to weight gain might not seem like such a serious problem.

I have never reached my goal.

This is a psychological filter. If it's true you've never reached your goal, then it's quite possible you've changed certain behaviors at different times and experienced weight loss. Ignoring the changes you've made and focusing solely on your weight loss goal is illogical, as your goal may be unrealistic. To successfully lose weight, you need to be happy with the positive changes you experience, even when there aren't any immediately visible results.

Because I couldn't successfully diet, I lacked willpower.

This is labeling yourself. Using such sentences to describe yourself doesn't help you understand the difficulties of weight loss, nor does it guarantee that anything you do in the future will have the same effect. Instead of seeking a label to make a superficial explanation, you should focus on increasing your body intelligence, including examining the reasons for your eating, understanding how you perceive your body, and how you use body intelligence to determine what can be improved, and then gradually making the necessary changes. This is what will help your diet.

How much weight do you want to lose?

To develop physical and mental intelligence, it's necessary to discard typical, irrational dieting attitudes and replace them with more rational weight loss perspectives. It's beneficial to start with your weight loss goals. Every time you plan to diet, you'll have a weight loss goal you hope to achieve. This goal might be based on an "objective" standard, such as the ideal weight for your height found in a height and weight chart.

Perhaps you weighed yourself underwater to determine your body fat percentage, and then calculated the weight you needed to lose. Or perhaps your doctor looked at a chart and told you what your ideal weight should be. Maybe you used a formula to calculate your Body Mass Index (BMI) to determine how much weight you need to lose to reach a healthy weight range. While these methods are objective, they are generally based on previous research and are not something an average person can easily understand. For example, there has been some sharp criticism regarding the methods used to collect height and weight data.

Beyond objective standards, you may have your own personal weight loss goals. Younger dieters may be easily tempted to use the appearance of their idolized movie stars or rock stars as their weight loss targets. Older dieters may use their past image as a reference point. For example, many women would be happy if they could fit into their wedding dress, while many men might naively recall how they looked during sports activities in high school or college. There may be a specific clothing or pants size that fits you perfectly, that you feel particularly good in, and your goal is to be able to wear that size again.

Weight goals are often based on the advice or even demands of parents, spouses, or friends. Holly, a 28-year-old dental assistant, recently divorced her drug-addicted husband, Doug. Immediately after the divorce, her mother pulled her aside and bluntly told her she needed to lose 20 pounds before she could start dating again. Because Holly was ashamed of her weight, and because her mother had previously warned her against marrying Doug, Holly believed her mother was right and began dieting to lose 20 pounds.

Tracy, a 31-year-old teacher, is another example of someone trying to lose weight to please others. She's married to Rode, a 30-year-old stockbroker. Tracy weighs 175 pounds and wants to lose 35 pounds. When I asked her why she decided on this goal, she reluctantly admitted it was Rode's idea. She plans to diet so her husband can be proud of her when they attend parties together. Holly and Tracy will both be disappointed because the desire to please others doesn't provide enough motivation for the changes needed for sustained weight loss.